At Sheringham town community newspaper. North Norfolk England UK.

Hullo an' how arrh yew doin' my bootees? Yes it's Hearsay No.19 already, and how the weeks roll by. I should by rights entitle this weeks column "Vic's triumph" yes after issue no 18's bit about "that hole in the road" lo and behold; less than a week later it was fixed obviously "somebody" had a word with "someone", yes well, we won't go there again.

So a few words from me, or so it seemed, worked, and got something done. However any celebrations seemed to have been a trifle premature. As by the very same "filled in hole" day that that job was completed, less than a metre away but up the Avenue this time, exactly the same scenario has happened again. But this time in such a position that the primary school children's bus can no longer turn and travel up the Avenue from Beeston Road. Oh how thoughtful that "someone" was to have arranged that piece of handy work. It's almost as frustrating as some of the previous Sheringham Town Councillors must be feeling at the moment. When it was announced that a few of their flock had orchestrated and misjudged a few hundred quid's worth of fiscal hand outs to what they thought were good causes at the time, several years ago. Only to find out that, due to the input and meddling of a certain Mr Clover on behalf of his Mother, our very own council find that the legal bill now runs to something like 80 grand! Quite a bit wouldn't you say, And for what? For some outsider to prove a point. The only thing he and his mother have proved is that litigation is very expensive. Is this Mr Clover in the legal profession himself one wonders? It did seem a bit odd that anyone would want to go to those extremes, especially as it was established that no actual harm was done in the first place! The questionable charge relating to inappropriate distribution of around 1200 pounds or something like that, to my mind should have been left well alone! If he's moaning about that little bit, what should the rest of us say about what his actions have cost us? With all that dosh down the drain, I'm sure we could have put it to better use. Such as getting Common Lane resurfaced for a start. Interestingly enough the top end was done along Woodland Rise West. What was the matter with the rest of it, wasn't it posh enough for them? So I reckon if you don't live here, keep "it" out of our business.

Talking of business, the same could have been said for some of the protesters the other week along the Cromer Road near to the proposed Tesco site. Some I gather were not even residents! And not that I'm age-ist or anything, far from it! But I couldn't seem to see anyone there under the age of 60 or thereabouts. So a well proportioned, representative section of the community presented there then. That said everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I respect their views whole heartedly. The only trouble with such an under supported turn out as that shown on that Saturday, is that is pertains to being a laughing stock in the eye of the outsider and the vast majority of the other onlookers, and doesn't do "the cause" any favours at all. My one and only actual point to make on the subject would be this simple observation. (Not getting involved with this one) Ask any of those protesters about the implications of this new development, or any other and they will tell you that THE MAJORITY OF THE PEOPLE OF THE TOWN INCLUDING THE SHOPKEEPERS ARE AGAINST IT! With that statement is followed by the reassurance that the town would lose all the small local business' because their very own towns folk (everyone but presumably not themselves) would endeavour to go to the cheaper and tackier store. Now then if what they said in the first statement were true, why then would THE MAJORITY OF THE TOWNS FOLK go to the new store if they didn't want it here in the first place. If indeed THE MAJORITY was in fact against it? I for one would never use a store, or shop anywhere where they sold items in a way that I did not agree with morelly or otherwise, whether it was cheaper and/or convenient or not. So why is there all this worry and heartache? Surely if NOBODY WANTS IT, NO ONE WILL SHOP THERE? Or perhaps most of us actually do? Spooky that, isn't it? One thing for sure is that "STORE WARS" is here to stay for a bit.

Will it be won by the evil empire or the pure of heart down trodden simple town's folk of Sheringham? Who knows? But what ever you do over the coming weeks, watch this space! Still never mind it'll all be over by the time Mr. Beckham breaks another toe or our very own Timbo wins Wimby. And may the force be with them and you. And so to my last comments in this edition it looks like the entrants in this years panto horse derby are beginning to gather their fetlocks and mounting a valiant campaign to ensuring the best quality performances. Will the race be over hurdles is the question being asked? Will the entrant asses be asked to charge through jelly filled paddling pools, or a custard spilling gauntlet. Excitement and tensions are beginning to rise as "the race day" approaches. With training going into it's final stages. Just who will be Sheringham's first Nag to win this prestigious award? I hope there will be the filly of the day award and who knows in future years perhaps they might run to a dressage competition and gymkhana trials arena for the better class and well groomed. E.G. Old nags with a good nose for the trots. (By the way the eating of any curry for 24 hours prior to the event should be strictly forbidden). Personally I can't wait for this new carnival event. So I hope you lot out there won't disappoint your prospective audiences by giving it a no show. So come on rally all your mates, borrow one of Grans old sheets and get making those costumes. It doesn't even have to be a horse. Why not a Sheringham SCAMROD camel with the hump, or even an old dragon? But we'll say no more about the mother in law. So go on give it a go and remember I'll be watching! See yew al'agether. Take care Vic.

WHAT IF EVERYONE IN THE TOWN SHOPS THERE?

Sheringham Community Paper