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Howdy folks! And palpable greetings to one and
all with this the 29 issue of hearsay. Now what was that old saying? If you want to know
the time ask a policeman, or to be politically correct these days, it would have to be ask
a police constable. If you can actually find one that is. Well, now we know where they've
all been recently don't we? |
Yep that's several thousand of these poor souls had their
leave cancelled as the powers that be in the land, quite frankly took leave of their
senses. And why? Well it seems that Mr. President Bush and his entourage required 14
thousand of them for the duration of his visit. Quite why it took 14 thousand Bobbies just
so that he'd always know the time was beyond me, especially when our very own Big Ben was
just around the corner, but hey that's Americans for you. I only hope he slept well
between her Majesty's sheets. I guess he didn't have to fork out a crisp tenner to visit
the place like the rest of us do when we want to view the royal household. No of course
not, but this little stay of his did cost us a penny or two. In fact nigh on 5 Million
smackeroonies. Just think what we could have done with that cash here in Sheringham. I
guess half of it would have covered the cost of having Common Lane resurfaced for a start.
Leaving the other half to cover a week's family shop in our local convenience store. There
might even be change left over, enough to super glue the hands together of the little
darlings who persist in spray canning any and every plain piece of bare wall along the
seafront. Even our school's mural on the tank has succumbed to this extra artwork.
Perhaps, not only gluing their little hands together, we could also glue their little
botties to a chair in a classroom, and insist they recite one hundred times," I must
not scrawl graffiti anywhere. Even if it is on cracked and crumbling concrete walls that
are covered and oozing with green slimy stuff." Of course "I'm a Prat"
tattooed to their foreheads would be a touch draconian but nearer to the point and a
warning to future generations.
Now then, who saw Kate O'Hara in the Little Theatre the other week? Wonderful stuff, in
fact the last time I saw something as powerful and moving as that was whilst I was queuing
up from the Cromer Road roundabout for my flu jab at the surgery! In fact at one point it
was so long, a poor confused person thought it might have been the early entrants rank for
next years Star Wars convention. I had to tell him that the only thing that was out of
this world was this queue and at that he left. Oh yes there's nothing quite like
volunteering oneself to be stabbed in the arm and injected with a healthy dose of
manufactured egg-cultured virus to start the winter off with a smile. Providing of course,
you don't actually catch your death of cold queuing up for the stuff in the first place.
Still the idea of collecting a number on arrival and waiting one's turn is very appealing
and fair. Quite frankly why on earth they can't adopt this regime across the appointment's
board is beyond me. Just think of it, no more jammed phone lines first thing in the
morning, no more taking the week off work to see the doc. The first day is used up trying
to get through, the next is used up droping in and being told to come back tomorrow etc
etc. No I like the idea so why can't we have it please? At least one can please oneself if
one wants to sit and wait it out or not.
I knew it, when it starts to rain it never quite knows when to leave off, a bit like the
mother-in-law's Christmas commentary. So to escape you feel you have to take yourself off
to the shops to spend a fiver or two, only now the older type ones, from late November
onwards are no longer legal tender. But have no fear. Yes you can always send them to me!
No? Well perhaps not, of course, the other alternative is to take them to your local bank
where they can be paid in or exchanged for new ones. Oh, if only one could afford the same
luxury to one's spouse and/or families sometimes. Especially in the ritual run up to
Christmas. Advertising for that must have toy at ONLY £99.99 abound and trying to keep up
with the family on benefits down the road is sometimes very hard to bear. |
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Unlike the Italian artist Titian who was reputed to have
reached the grand old age of one hundred and three, me thinks with all the Christmas
pressure this year, I'll be lucky to survive the year out let alone reach my hundreds.
However with that time of year approaching (Xmas and New Year) it might be a good time to
think about a few New Years resolutions. Perhaps like Titian, I may be able to paint a
more positive picture come the New Year when my current account starts to recover and the
excesses of Yuletide abate.
Well here we are again. The end of another stimulating read, and thought provoking
gibberish. The next edition will combine Xmas and New Year so get shopping out there.
There's not many more days left for you to buy me a prezzie. Thanks in anticipation
anyway. Yours Vic. |
| MODERN ART? |
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Over the last year St. Joseph's Catholic Church has welcomed many Summer visitors to
Sunday Mass. We have also welcomed many hundreds of visitors to various events including
our Christmas Bazaar, Summer Fete, the Bygones Exhibition, Monthly Beetle Drive and other
events
Please may I take this opportunity to say thank you. Also my thanks to the shops who
kindly display notices. We look forward to welcoming all who wish to our Christmas Masses
and would like to wish you a Happy Christmas and New Year.
Yours Fr. Tony Webb and all at St.Joseph's
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Merry Christmas from
All at the @ Sheringham Paper
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