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How are yer doin' an orl agether? Yes it's Vic
time again. Now are you sittin' comfortably? - Then I'll begin. You know the other day
someone said to me a funny thing. He said "Vic, they reckon thas snowing up in
Scotland". Yes and that's not doing too badly here" I replied bemusedly. As
quite why anyone would have the notion that snow fell upward in Scotland rather than
falling down to earth was to me, an amusing statement to say the least. |
Still by that reckoning, the snow is not all that's coming
down. Yes I feel we have a victory in our sights of the council tax variety. I wish I
could claim my contribution in last month's hearsay column was the catalyst behind the
change of heart, but they pipped me at the post as we were going to publication. Never
mind, knowing that this year's rates bills are not now going to be raking in the same
amount as the HSBC's yearly profits at our expense, I'm a happy bunny. It was nice to
think that our elected elite were listening to the views of the electorate for once. Well
actually me thinks they might have been trying to secure their own re-election at the very
least. And to be fair it does take a brave soul to stand up and speak out about what's
right and wrong. Isn't that right Mrs. Short? Oops, oh no politics; we don't want to go
there do we?
Now then, we have recently over the last month or two experienced the most extraordinary
events. Leading to, I might add the most horrendous chaos and traffic disruption, business
and school closures, not to mention power cuts, T.V. signal distortion and wipeout, with
delay mayhem and driving madness of every kind. And just what was this cataclysmic
catastrophe? This disaster of unrelenting voracity? A nuclear attack by Sadam Hussain?
Total meltdown of our civilisation due to apocalyptic armageddon? Or even a ninety five
percent off sale in Hunts? No of course not, this ridiculous scenario was caused solely by
a couple of centimetres of the fluffy white stuff " der schnee flocken"! I've
taken the bother to spell that part out in this issue in German as it seems every other
language that the met office tells our road clearing teams must be in Double Dutch. Still
to give them their due, this last episode was somewhat better than the first. Prompting me
to believe that erring on the side of caution and closing the High School for the second
time was a teeny-weeny bit presumptuous. Call me an old voluptuary, if you like, but I'd
got rather used to the idea of the kids going back to school for a bit longer than three
days before their next day off. I guess the cold snap made us all think about how
vulnerable we all are and how much we rely on each other. Yes, some of us had to dig out
the old Moon-boot Wellies, woolly thermal bodices along with the matching knickers and
sock set. And then, after asking the wife's permission to borrow such garments we took to
the cold wide world outside: leaving the car safely tucked up in the garage out of harms
way and any skidding boy racer vehicles, and ventured into town. After we spent hours of
buying up loaf after loaf to shove in the freezer, we need not have bothered, as leaving
it outside over night would have done, and sixty pints of full cream, semi, half fat,
condensed and powdered varieties of milk, we trek back to the house in the knowledge that
our very own bulk purchases could have fed half of the Third World for a fortnight. Still
the upside is that we won't need to buy any more until Easter and that bread and butter
pudding will be on every menu for the foreseeable future! Of course all this panic bulk
buying of produce causes both shortages of goods, and also shortages of temper as sure as
eggs are eggs, there's always the absent minded mother of four who can't get her hands on
ready sliced, part baked loaf, bap, roll or otherwise within a thirty mile radius. Well
not until the next delivery date anyway. |
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THE NEXT DAY! Which is my very point. The last time that
Sheringham or anywhere for that matter was unable to provide goods of any sort due to the
weather was sixteen years ago. Except of course during the petrol crisis a year or two ago
now. And the likelihood of a repeat of that (the snow) happening again is about as likely
as the Queen changing her faith or Tesco's deciding on a market stall in favour of a
superstore.
Never mind, however cold it was I was always comforted to know that I could warm myself
indoors with an indulgent cup of hot toddy chocolate, hot cross buns and a stale Easter
egg left over from the Boxing Day sales. I could adorn myself in this years summer and
autumn collection I purchased during the winter sales last year; and put my feet up on my,
not as yet paid for, buy now pay nowt 'till doomsday leather buy one get one free colour
co-ordinated Linda Barker suite. Oh well Christmas is only Nine months away. We might as
well go and spend what we haven't got. The government takes the rest in tax. It's not as
if we can even afford to look at the price of houses seriously around here any more. I
think I'll just sell up and live in a tent on the common or the beach. Well that's it for
this time. Until next time you take care out there and remember to keep warm and don't
forget the vest! All the best. Vic. |
'TESCO'
USES DEGRADABLE
PLASTIC SHOPPING BAGS |
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| SHERINGHAM
POST BOX REPLACED FOLLOWING LOCAL PRESSURE ON ROYAL MAIL |
| Royal Mail have reviewed a decision not to replace a post box on St
Austin's Grove, Sheringham, following its removal by vandals last July. Protests have been
listened to, and the box has now been repaired and returned following representations from
local people and North Norfolk Lib Dem MP Norman Lamb. Commenting on the decision,
Mr Lamb said: "I am delighted that Royal Male have listened to the views of local
people. The loss of this post box was a cause of inconvenience for many, and its
reinstatement has been warmly received by residents of St Austin's Grove and the
surrounding area." |
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